Vulnerability, Being Present, and Listening to God: A Conversation with Kurt Pflegl
This past week, I had a very moving conversation with my friend Kurt Pflegl, which I recorded and turned into my first podcast!
A little over a year ago, I was living in San Luis Obispo, California and got connected to Kurt as he had recently finished a two-year coaching certification. Kurt quickly became a mentor and friend, and truly is one of the most gentle and present people I’ve encountered. He is uniquely equipped to shepherd people through his experiences of pastoring, coaching, counseling, and listening to people and to God.
Our conversation began with Kurt explaining how coaching has impacted his recent life and provided him with tools to help lead people closer to God. We then hear about Kurt’s thought processes that allow him to truly listen to others, and we discuss how vulnerability creates the needed space for people to be listened to in today's culture. Wherever you stand in your faith and beliefs, I believe any of us can gain something simply from hearing Kurt’s journey and his heart posture towards humans.
And yeah, there’s a lot of highlight moments listed below because if you don’t listen to it, I really hope you gain something from reading these key moments below.
Highlight moments and their time marks:
5:40 min: Kurt’s coaching training: Jeff Caliguire: CEO of We Train Coaches (formerly Coaching Transformation Academy) https://www.wetraincoaches.com/
7:58 min: Coaching is about calling out the beauty and the power that people don’t even know they have in them
8:09-11:30 min: Kurt explains his discipleship training school, Elevate SLO. “We train people to listen. To listen to God, to listen to themselves, to listen to other people. And then we give what we’re hearing and seeing.”
12:17 min: “All I have to offer anyone is what God has given me and these experiences. So, all I’m doing is sharing my journey. My desire is that no one feels threatened by this and they’re willing to take what works for them.”
14:14 min: I ask Kurt, “What are some tools you’ve found to be helpful to better listen to people?”
14:25 min: “Personally, it starts with understanding how safe I am with God… what’s the minimum requirement for us to come to God? Are you weary, are you heavy burdened? In other words, have you been born?”
17 min: “When we are around gentle and humble people, we feel safe to just be us. The longer we are around those people the safer we feel and the more we open up and be us.”
17:57 min: “The conviction of God is so different from human conviction, like in human terms of convicting somebody. God’s conviction to me looks so different now. Now, it’s Him asking, ‘Can I carry that for you?”
17:53 min: “We are people who only live now. That narrows things down. If we really become present to what we’re thinking and feeling we can relax and go, ‘okay God, this is what I’m thinking and feeling.’ And then we can really be present to another human being.”
21:17 min: “Vulnerability is literally the superpower… we as humans are contagious and so is our attitude. If we continue to practice vulnerability, other people will catch it.”
22:13 min: “Leadership is influence and initiative. When I take the initiative to be vulnerable and humble, and be honest with how I’m doing, that creates influence.”
24:00 min: “Someone who is willing to not be afraid to face what’s inside, ‘the inner wilderness’, and learns to surrender it, is the person who can now say ‘I’ve been there. That’s true influence.’”
28:10 min: “I find that my biggest problems are when I can’t accept that I’m finite”
“When we relax and accept that we are finite, then we accept His infinite patience
30:54 min: “I find that when we are open to receiving from God, he gives us more than we can handle ourselves, in a good way, so that it overflows.”
31:14 min: “If we can learn slowly to give ourselves to others without expecting anything in return, that’s the place of freedom. If we can learn to see our expectations and surrender those, and just embrace our finiteness, then all we can do is receive and give”
To check out more of Kurt’s work:
Kurt’s Podcast: Life Hurts, God Heals (Available on all podcast platforms)
