The Gap Between My Standards and Reality
This week, I got sick and I missed two days of work. I also posted this blog a day late. I remember thinking that I would get more done with the extra free time on my hands, but instead, I spent most of my time doing things I consider not very valuable. Although I give myself some grace this week for being sick, I am learning that I am inconsistent.
I hope to be the steady, dependable version of myself I envision in my head, but many days I am not that person. Ironically, I was relating with a friend a week ago on the fact that we waste our time more when our schedule is less full. At the beginning of this week, I saw myself creating a few Instagram posts, writing my blog post before Friday, and reading several chapters in a book. In reality, I completed one Instagram post, I started writing my blog post on Sunday, and I read one chapter in my book. Even in creating this blog, I noticed that my writing style was negative one day and positive the next.
“I feel liberated upon admitting my inconsistencies to close friends because they receive my flaws with much more grace.”
I feel liberated upon admitting my inconsistencies to close friends because they receive my flaws with much more grace. Currently, I am unsatisfied with my business because it does not match my expectations of what I wanted it to look like by this point. I am struggling to attract more clients and I find the broad path of entrepreneurship daunting because I prefer rules and order. However, following a few conversations this week with friends, mentors, and clients, I discovered new ways to make progress in different areas with my business. I quickly lost sight of the value of my business upon fixating on how my work was not meeting my standards, but through affirming the impact of my efforts thus far, these people reignited my motivation.
I want to continue setting high standards for myself, but I also know this requires me to navigate the gap between my standards and who I am in reality. In order to progress upward, I need the less pressurized space afforded to me through expressing my shortcomings to others. As I converse with the same people through my learning moments, their consistency encourages me to grow further despite my inconsistencies.
